the dreadmill again????

Ugh...so I got to the base gym today and there were not very many treadmills so i had to wait a bit, I was supposed to run for 40 mins but had a gravity strength training class, so I ran for 35 mins. Once again, my head kept telling me to stop running...for those that have a hard time running, just tell yourself at the next 5 min mark i can go down .2 in speed...got me through all 35 mins of hell today.....i ran for 3 hrs straight in nov wth is wrong with me now??? Once again my mind was drifting to what I would write in my blog today...for those that struggle with weight you may know where I am coming from the excuses, I am too tired, I don't have time, but it tastes so good, I will just run longer or work out tonight (which never happens), I am not meant to be thin, etc we all have those excuses. So I just wanted to give you all some more of my history...If I can lose weight and run a half marathon and complete 3 triathlons so far so can you...lets see I have dealt with childhood sexual abuse, a mother who had 5 husbands while I lived at home, a divorce, deployments, my son being abused and the custody battle, my sister committing suicide, my stepdad and grandpa dying two weeks apart, and becoming a SAHM after 10 years of being in the Navy!!! Life throws us curve balls but we choose the outcome, sometimes it seems like we don't but it's your life if you don't like how you are living it, then change it. So as I ran today I thought of the readers that may start reading this! No one woke up and ran a marathon without taking that first step in a training run!!! I can do this and so can you! So as I go throughout the rest of my evening and to a girl scout cookie meeting, I will keep my blog, scale, tomorrow's weight watcher meeting and my gym date in my mind as those girls giggle over cookies!!! I will RESIST eating a cookie, I know what they taste like, I know I like them but damn I wanna wear my polka dot bikini cuz im in Diego, Trick!!!!