Competion vs supportive

We all joke that on a treadmill in the gym we are racing the person next to us. Of course I felt this way when I was in shape and could easily run at 6.0 now that I am struggling between 5-5.5 I don't always feel this way. Today was our first official WCRR half/full marathon training day, we did a 4 mile run. Now I had signed up to run in the Vegas group (all the groups are named after marathons), which is a 12-13 min pace. Previously when I was about 35 lbs lighter and ran alot faster I was in the catalina group (before they added Vegas) which was a 10-13 min group. Well we drive up (Dee and I, Todd had duty) to a very rainy morning. I hadn't planned for that type of weather in my wonderful sunny San Diego and was in capris and a tank top!!!! As I stood there shivering and nippling (embarrasing) I decided to hell with trying to keep up a faster pace for a solid 4 miles without knowing anyone in the group so I told Dee I was going to run with her. On our last 1/2 mile she told me she knew it was all about competition and I said no, not this time. I am truly wanting to run with her to help us both build up speed and stamina. So is it always about competition or can you sacrifice your speed/stamina to help others get to their goals?

food log 1-7-12

So after thinking I was going to kill over on my 3 mile WCRR run this morning I have successfully ate properly today! here is my day in review.
Breakfast was blueberry oatmeal for 4 pts
after run/morning snack was a smoothie made of 2c (40cal) almond breeze, 2T PB2, 1 t olive oil, 1 banana 4 pts
lunch was nana's lentil soup 5 pts over a bed of romaine lettuce with a side of a cutie, blueberries, blackberries
afternoon snack was a banana and a sweet and salty peanut granola bar for 5 pts
dinner was a can of black beans and havest vegetable steamables with 1 t olive oil for 15 points.
i have 1 leftover point but i don't think I will use it.
so far I have only drank 32oz of water, but NO soda! will be drinking a 32oz bottle of water with 1 crystal light on my way to work.

just wanted to say that when you start to see yourself getting lazy or gaining weight just think of all the time it took to get where you are. 3 miles used to be so easy, now i had to run/walk it. Before I have ran 18 miles and now 3 is hard! But I will get back there!!

oh gym how its a love hate relationship!

I need to love you but like to hate you!!! But oh the gym is so good for me, it improves my moods and helps my figure and my heart!!! Off to the gym I will go tonight, with goals of running every morning at 530 to the stop sign and back (about 2 miles)! The ball is in THREE weeks!!!

so sad :(

I usually don't get too upset or emotional over people I don't know passing. I don't know if it is because my kids are getting older and it hits home or because I have ran those trails. When you hear someone goes missing you hope for the best and fear for the worst. Now my only regret is that I didn't go out with a search party to say I did my part. My heart breaks when I think of Chelsea King, which I am sure would have grown into a wonderful, successful woman but all was cut too short because some criminal couldn't keep his hands to himself. I can not imagine the pain and hurt that all her friends and family are going through right now and the new fear that each person has when they go on a run. Running is to improve oneself it is is too lose weight, make your heart healthier, or to compete against others and these sick, horrible rapist/murderers have to make it become a nightmare. My heart goes out to all those that knew Chelsea.

trail running and the evil scale!

So before I get to tell everyone, skull candy earbuds ROCK!!! ok whew I keep meaning to post that! you can get them at target, santa brought mine along with the sockguy sock monkey socks i rocked on my grueling 6 mile trail run through Balboa Park. Man it sucked and I thought of my blog and what I would say and what I should change, since I keep getting reminded that the reason I am not losing weight is because of my DIET!!! blah! why does food have to be such an evil thing, why can't i love to eat clean or unprocessed foods, so starting tomorrow I will post what I eat daily! maybe knowing that the whole world can come see what I am eating will remind me each time I wander into my kitchen to stay focused! Today was good though I went to a bday party and did not eat any pizza or cake! score! I was suppose to go out to Hooters tonight but I can not trust myself around food right now, and I need to control this, I think my ass or legs are getting fatter. I want to start eating cleaner, not all the way just more veggies and fruits and lean proteins. So my scale....I weigh myself everyday more than once usually, which I have read is a sign of an eating disorder. I don't think there is anything wrong in weighing daily though! But I'd like to see those numbers going down...so as Dee says i shouldn't wait till tomorrow because tomorrow never comes....
breakfast-oatmeal (homemade quick oats) w/flaxseed meal, brown sugar, walnuts, and cranberries
snack-greek yogurt w/frozen blueberries and splenda
lunch-veggies w/some dip, fruit, and 6in subway veggie delight on honey oat
snack-fake baked pear and apple then a banana
dinner-going to make a pbj w/natural pb and on ww bread! then head to an adult only toy party!!!

more running

so what really sucks is how fast your endurance goes when you take a break. Now I am the type that I am all or nothing. So I either go to the gym all the time or I don't go. Hence the same with the blog, I need to do this everyday or I will stop doing it. Today was a much better food day for me, Friday I think I ate like 5000 calories or something. So I got up and made my oatmeal which consists of oats, flaxseed meal, brown sugar, cranberries, and walnuts. I was worried my body would rebel w/the food for my 5 mile run, but i did just fine. We ran from Liberty Station to the Coast Guard guard shack and back. I have to say the way back is always easier. It was pretty cool today, the group was HUGE! I don't know if its because its Jan or what, but when I started WCRR back in July the group was about half this size. It's always fun to run with people, makes it less boring. I can't wait till I am not constantly looking at my garmin wondering when the run will be over though. so today I skipped having mexican food with my friends to stay home with the fam and have subway. I am really proud of myself for that because I am a social butterfly and love to hang out. It saved me money and calories though! Well I am way tired, so off to bed I go.

the dreadmill again????

Ugh...so I got to the base gym today and there were not very many treadmills so i had to wait a bit, I was supposed to run for 40 mins but had a gravity strength training class, so I ran for 35 mins. Once again, my head kept telling me to stop running...for those that have a hard time running, just tell yourself at the next 5 min mark i can go down .2 in speed...got me through all 35 mins of hell today.....i ran for 3 hrs straight in nov wth is wrong with me now??? Once again my mind was drifting to what I would write in my blog today...for those that struggle with weight you may know where I am coming from the excuses, I am too tired, I don't have time, but it tastes so good, I will just run longer or work out tonight (which never happens), I am not meant to be thin, etc we all have those excuses. So I just wanted to give you all some more of my history...If I can lose weight and run a half marathon and complete 3 triathlons so far so can you...lets see I have dealt with childhood sexual abuse, a mother who had 5 husbands while I lived at home, a divorce, deployments, my son being abused and the custody battle, my sister committing suicide, my stepdad and grandpa dying two weeks apart, and becoming a SAHM after 10 years of being in the Navy!!! Life throws us curve balls but we choose the outcome, sometimes it seems like we don't but it's your life if you don't like how you are living it, then change it. So as I ran today I thought of the readers that may start reading this! No one woke up and ran a marathon without taking that first step in a training run!!! I can do this and so can you! So as I go throughout the rest of my evening and to a girl scout cookie meeting, I will keep my blog, scale, tomorrow's weight watcher meeting and my gym date in my mind as those girls giggle over cookies!!! I will RESIST eating a cookie, I know what they taste like, I know I like them but damn I wanna wear my polka dot bikini cuz im in Diego, Trick!!!!

Just the beginning!

Well this is my first attempt at my own blog, I joined a team weight loss blog but we didn't really use it. So today as I was running on the dreadmill I thought I am finally going to start my own blog...why because just maybe this is the year I get to the magic number of 155 on the damn scale that I have determined as my goal weight. And hopefully along the journey I do or say something that will inspire others. So about me...

Well I am Anna, nursing student (RN as of 12-10-09, 5 classes left to graduate), mom of 4, and a Navy wife (hubby is on a submarine in Pt Loma, San Diego). I have been and egg donor for a friend and a surrogate twice (a singleton in 2006 and twins in 2008). My kids are 5, 7, 12, and 13. The boys 7 & 13 give me a run for my money and my girls are pretty easy. Currently I am supposed to be applying to the master's degree program for midwifery and women's health NP, deadline is Feb 1st....hmmm that's probably what I should be doing right now. Today marks 6 weeks post op from a breast reduction/lift and a lower body lift. Oh I guess I should give my weight history. I have always struggled with my weight, distinct times I remember are my sophomore physical for the swim team (171 lbs), recruiters office my senior year (160lbs), the day I joined the Navy (148 lbs), first PRT after bootcamp (170lbs), my pregnancy weights were 232, 226, 244, 257, and finally my last pregnancy and the beginning of my final weight loss journey I was a whopping 282 pounds!!! I have with the help of the bodybugg, weight watchers, and two different personal trainers at 24 hr fitness got all the way down to 177. I got stuck at 180 forever, and actually gained to 188 the day of my surgery on 12-14-09. The doctor took about a lb off my breast and 12 lbs off my abs/butt/hips, gotta love that man. I was 174 after surgery and have yoyo'd up to 178 since surgery...so maybe this blog along with my marathon training (Rock n Roll San Diego on June 6, 2010) will help me get to my goal weight of 155 by Jan 1, 2011. Slow and Steady wins the race!!!

so today I went to the gym...45 mins on that damn treadmill thank you Santa for those awesome skullcandy earbuds!! I wanted to quit at 20 mins, but good music and my thoughts of what to write in my new blog kept me going....so here goes nothing....tomorrow its a new day, I will eat better than I did today (although today wasn't too bad) and oh i have a date w/the dreadmill around 9am!