Running with your kid and typing vomit

Ok you know when you sit in a class and they ask who here has children, and up goes your hand or it doesn't. Well I have a houseful between Todd and I we have 5 kids. Their ages range from 7-15, yes I have teenagers, to be precise I have THREE! Two that live with me which are both 14, FUN TIMES! But this post is about my 7 yr old, after I decide I am going to go out on my run yesterday by myself her little voice says but mom are you taking me? My answer is NO! But mom you said and you need to be honest. So ok grab your bike, disgruntled I say. Man chasing your kid on her bike is frazzling and kinda speedy. Instead of my 2.5 mile run I had planned I did a mile, but knocked a min off my usual slow pace I have been running, so it paid off. So enough about my exercise and scale, on to the things that cause stress!

So those who know me have seen my struggles to get to my life long dream of a becoming a nurse, specifically a L&D nurse to become a midwife later. So I guess an update and just to sorta vent and destress about it. So after killing myself to get prereqs done while being active duty and the disappointment of 2 MECP packages being turned down (the program that would allow me to go to college while getting paid and then later becoming an officer) I GOT OUT! wow really after being in charge of sailors I got to be a stay at home I had wanted to be, shocker alert I DID NOT LIKE IT!! Then the rude awakening, CA nursing schools have waiting lists and oh I had to retake Micro Bio, which also had a waiting list!!!! So while waiting I did 2 surrogacy pregnancies gaining a total of 57 and 82 lbs and made two families!!! Speed up to finally getting in school, that cost $44k, thank you GI Bill for helping out a little. I know this is probably boring, you can stop reading, but I am going to keep typing for my sanity purposes! I finish school take the NCLEX and now I am a RN! woot woot, then I get my BSN another YA I cross the stage with my mom and brother there and my older kids, my husband was deployed, again no shocker there. Now to find a job, well here we go, there are 100 openings and holy moly 1500 applicants, and I was not a successful candidate, nice blow to the self esteem. So after all that hard work, waiting, and cha-ching (money spent) I am an unemployed RN. So after debating I choose to move to a small border town in Texas (Eagle Pass). OMG for fellow new nurses who may not know this, other states do not have certain regulations we have here in Ca, one being pt/nurse ratio. I had 6-7 patients and was a new nurse!!! Well being separated from my husband was not an ideal situation for my family so the pursuit of getting a job in San Diego began and I got hired at Sharp Memorial. YAY me!!! the move back, I was fully moved in Sept 2011. Now the unit that I was hired for is not opening and the stress of finding a position was upon me again. So the little bit of hope that I could move into women's health came alive again. After a disappointing interview but pointers on what I should do, I am again in what seems like a rat race to try to obtain my goal. I am in a 6 week class, and scheduled for NRP (neonatal CPR), I was also told I should volunteer and some other stuff. I guess where I am at is just like in weight loss, sometimes the goal seems so far away and the steps to get there seem so HARD and the goal starts slipping and I tell myself I can settle and be happier somewhere else.

LETS BE REALISTIC!!!!! NO ONE WANTS TO SETTLE BEING OVERWEIGHT! so much like my weight loss I have to take my career in small steps too. When one door shuts another one opens. So small steps towards my goal, school, NRP, becoming a doula either through DONA or hopefully UCSD's volunteer program, and I want to become a lactation consultant! So if you kept reading, sorry I am not a poetic writer and probably boring but these has made me feel better and hopefully inspires someone out there on the internet. SMALL STEPS TO GET TO A GOAL!!!!